August 31st, 2010
by MB
I was looking for books at the library on “Rome” and came across this book. It was written about Rome, of course, but it was illustrated by a name that sounded really familiar. I knew the person who illustrated it. He had gone to my church when I was 17. I remembered buying a shirt from him when I was 17 and thought of how talented he was. Now he is illustrating books and making comic books. I started following him on Facebook. His mom and my mom were friends at one point. I visited his blog and looked at his numerous sketches. He was quite the talented artist.
It got me thinking though about who I was in high school. All the hopes I had. All the things I wanted to be. I always wanted to be a journalist, but knew I was much to shy to do things like interviews. I wanted to write books. I never even made it to college. In some ways, I just don’t feel like I “made something” of myself. I got married, had kids, and now I homeschool. There is no fame in any of that. It is what it is. Nothing spectacular or stunning about it. I live a life of normalcy. I don’t feel all that talented most days.
Why do we feel like we have to be something special? Why do we feel like if we lack talent or a certain skill that we are less? I know I feel that way. I wake up and my house is my job. My kids are my job. Educating them daily is my job. It’s not glorified. It’s not always pretty. Sometimes its downright lonely. It often is a mirror showing all my frailties as a human. Many times there is no pretty bow to wrap the package that this is. It’s just life. I can’t sing. I can’t dance. I certainly can’t draw. I can’t even make anything out of origami. By human standards, I’m not all that talented. I could have made something of myself. I could have gone to college and been a writer or done something successful.
Here’s the thing: That wasn’t God’s plan for me. Who am I to question God’s plan?
I can’t draw, but I can find resources to teach my kids to learn. I might never write a book, but I enjoy blogging and emailing and can be thoughtful enough to send a hello to someone who might need it. I can’t sing, but I sang all my babies to sleep. To them, it meant something and still does. I never went to college, but somehow I taught myself web design and everyday am teaching myself what it means to be a homeschool mom. I’m always learning. And these hands could not make much out of anything, but they give the best hugs to my kids when they need it, wipe tears away, and flip through pages of books and most importantly the Bible. These feet haven’t traveled all that far from home, but they have walked on paths that God has led me down. My voice isn’t very loud nor will I ever feel ambitious enough to preach a sermon or stand up in front of thousands with just my voice to be heard with some worthwhile sayings on my lips, but they have said a quiet “I love you”, spoken a truth to lead my kids back to God’s path, or simply have said “I’m sorry. Please forgive me.”
No, I’m not talented. I did not become what I wanted to be when I was 17. But what I am is far better than what I could have done. Better yet is where I am headed. We will all stand and give glory to the One who really deserves it someday. In the meantime, I pray that I will constantly be humbled by how God has brought me through and what He has planned for me.
Technorati Tags: dreams, goals, homeschool, mom, mothering
Christian Walk, Don't Waste Your Life, Encouragement, Home Education | 
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August 21st, 2010
by MB
Have you ever walked into a showroom? Maybe they were selling cars or maybe it was a model home. You may have noticed how perfect everything was. If you had your kids with, you might have wished they had stayed home. You just couldn’t stand the thought of them possibly ruining it. I’ve been to people’s houses like this too. You walk in and everything is immaculate…definitely not made for sticky children. The carpet is white and the couches are beyond clean. The walls are freshly painted and everything is just…perfect. You dare not move too much or drink anything or do anything that would cause mass panic from the owner. It’s pristine and they want it kept that way. I always feel really uncomfortable in places like that. I just don’t always feel like I’m welcome and that the owners are just waiting for you to leave. I’m relieved when we do too especially with rowdy children like mine.
In Psalms, David talks a lot about being “blameless”. He says in Psalms 18:23 “I have been blameless before him and have kept myself from sin.” I thought a lot about this passage over the last 3 days. How can one really be blameless? I came to the conclusion that we can’t. Only God can make us blameless. David wasn’t blameless because of how great he was. He was blameless because of how great God was and is. Ephesians 1:3-5 states, “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will..” 2 Samuel 22:33 says, “This God is my strong refuge and has made my way blameless.” God makes us blameless.
So what does this have to do with what I was talking about earlier? I think God has a showroom too. He lets us in, but the thing is…we are all dirty. At best, we are horrible beings. But when we enter in His house, we are miraculously clean. We are considered pure and spotless. We can jump on God’s white furniture and run through His house because He has made us without blemish if we only take the time to meet with Him, seek Him out, and come into His house. And we want to be there. We don’t feel uncomfortable. God welcomes us over and over and invites us back and we don’t have to worry about taking off our shoes. He knows we are dirty anyway. We don’t have to worry because God isn’t going to make us go away and feel like we ruined it. He accepts us into His house dirt and all. Even though we are filthy, He looks at us as if we are clean, spotless, and purified.
That’s how I know I’m blameless. Not because my shoes are clean or I make a good house keeper or I make the kids leave. It’s because God chose me to be blameless and He makes me clean. Think of that next time you feel like God doesn’t want to forgive you or that you are unworthy. His house is clean. All you have to do is enter it and be cleaned too.
Bible, Encouragement, Motherhood | No Comments »
August 7th, 2010
by MB
It would seem odd that a book called “Trusting God: Even when Life Hurts” would fall into my lap. The funny thing is I actually own this book. When I first got married, a family friend gave it to me and over the years I have tried to read it all the way through and never did. I would read the first chapter and have to stop and think about the truths. They weren’t “God loves you” kind of truths. They were “God is holding up the chair you are sitting in and if it breaks, God ordained that.” kind of truths. And to be honest, I could not swallow what I read.
I got this book through NavPress unknowingly that it was the same book. The cover has changed and there have been a few minor additions, but overall the book is still heavy reading for someone who has never thought about every detail being ordained by God. Even though this book is not light reading, its so good. It is hands down, my favorite book. Why? Because it gets to the point of what all of this is for. It shows me– taking scripture references and walking me through each aspect of how God is and who He is and what that means for me–life changing concepts that I had to actually think through and be aware or realize if I was thinking wrong thoughts or right ones. This book talks about natural disasters, acts of God, and events that shake our world. But the thing I loved about this book is it talks about God in relation to my life. No aspect of my life is overlooked. God uses it all. And it isn’t just some theological position. All of what Bridges says is backed up by biblical truths. He doesn’t minimize the pain of life, but he doesn’t sugar coat it either. He uses God’s word to show the reader exactly what God says about experiences and shows us that despite our emotional state, what the truth is.
Bridges doesn’t stop there though. He tells us what our response should be to such a wonderful, amazing, detail oriented, goal oriented God. Thankfulness, praise, repentance, and submission. There was a reason I didn’t read this book until now. God even ordained that. It was because I needed it right now in my life at this very moment to see God’s goodness and faithfulness in my life and to realize His overflowing love and compassion for me. I highly recommend this book to anyone — those who are just growing in their faith as well as those who think they have it all together. It’s a great book to those who have never heard these truths before, but also a great reminder to us who have that God reigns on His throne and you can trust Him–even when life hurts.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from NavPress Publishers as part of their Blogger Review Program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commision’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
Technorati Tags: books, Christian living, Christianity
Book Reviews, Christian Walk, Encouragement | 2 Comments »
August 6th, 2010
by MB
My husband has a really annoying habit of turning on a movie and then falling asleep 5 minutes into it. I’m always the one who doesn’t want to watch the movie in the first place, but then its on and I can’t go to sleep (I’m such an auditory person…any noise will keep me awake). I start talking to him and I look over and he’s practically snoring. It drives me insane.
When I was pregnant with my children, there was an ongoing joke in our house that I would be driving myself to the hospital because my husband can sleep through a tornado. If I need his help and he’s sleeping, I might as well forget about it. I literally have to scream in order for him to wake up. It’s like he’s half dead.
It’s easy for us to think of God like this too. We try to fit Him in some kind of human box and make Him more like us. We think He isn’t listening. We think we need to speak louder or more often. We might pray about something, but we think God doesn’t care so we go try our own methods of getting what we want. We play games with our own thoughts thinking God is not listening. Worse yet, we don’t think God can see us or that He knows our hearts. How can God be everywhere? We can’t fathom that God is someone who is beyond our comprehension. He can’t possibly know that I did that. He can’t possibly know what I’m thinking.
Psalms 121:2-4 says:
My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;
indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.
I was thinking about this verse where it says “he…will neither slumber or sleep”. I was trying to figure out if God was trying to be repetitive. I looked up the word slumber. It of course means to sleep. It also means “A state of inactivity or dormancy.” That got me thinking about how God is always moving, always active, always playing a hand in each step of our lives. God is not inactive. He doesn’t sleep. There is nothing that He doesn’t know about. There is no small detail left to fate. God knows it all.
Stop for a second and think about this powerful truth. God knows every thought, deed, unspoken word, circumstance, and heart issue you are dealing with. He doesn’t just know it in this moment, He knows it from the moment He formed you. He knows what every day, ever minute, every second of your life has been so far and He knows what is to come. There is nothing that gets overlooked and nothing left untouched. God isn’t sleeping. God does not slumber. He has a very active hand in your comings and goings. He knows where your steps lead and where they have taken you.
I am going to choose to believe this truth today. God knows me. He knows my deepest hurts and my greatest joys. He knows what is to come. Thank you God for knowing me better than I know myself. We are loved by an all knowing God. Breath that in.
Proverbs 16:9 “In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps.”
Technorati Tags: Christianity, marriage
Bible, Christian Walk, Encouragement, God's Sovereignty, family life, marriage | 3 Comments »
August 5th, 2010
by MB
You could plant me like a tree beside a river
You could tangle me in soil and let my roots run wild
And I would blossom like a flower in the desert
But for now just let me cry
You could raise me like a banner in a battle
Put victory like a fire behind my shining eyes
And I would drift like falling snow over the embers
But for now just let me lie
Bind up these broken bones
Mercy bend and breathe me back to life
But not before You show me how to die
(Lyrics from Audrey Assad “Show Me”)
I love this song. (YouTube Link: here) It reminds me that in this season, I don’t have to be a mighty warrior with my armor on winning a battle for Christ. God is at work whether I’m broken and left for dead or if I’m fighting and have my roots deeply planted in the ground. God is always at work. Even now. Even when I’m angry at so many things. Even when I’m sick of the injustices I see. Even when life just doesn’t seem worth it. God is there.
Psalms 139:7-10
Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
The last verses in this set of lyrics from Audrey Assad say this:
So let me go like a leaf upon the water
Let me brave the wild currents flowing to the sea
And I will disappear into a deeper beauty
But for now just stay with me
God, for now just stay with me
Encouragement, family life | 6 Comments »
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